After being home for just over 2 weeks, I have just one thing to say...
BRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!
It's cold over here!
Actually, I think I have a lot more than just that to say, but it's all forming very slowly in my head (possibly because the cold is slowing my brain function down).
I'm home and I'm not at all feeling how I expected to feel. I thought I'd be ready for break, but I'm running around like a headless chicken. Visiting family, visiting friends, looking at cars, looking for jobs, hangin with JB and all sorts of other little things. I feel like I can't sit still. I have to move move move!
But, it's ok, I need to stay busy. I'm back in America and it hasn't quite hit me that this is probably where I'm going to be for a while. I feel poised for flight. I feel out of place.
And, as I told one of my co-teachers, I don't think there is such a thing as a "normal" life for me anymore. I may just always be in this in between state that keeps me aware that there is more than just what's in front of me in this world. That, a person can have two homes, or three... or more in different parts of the planet.
And, maybe most important... that a person can recognize that there shouldn't be something as a "normal life," but that having adventures, taking risks, seeing the world and all that God made in it is a beautiful, awesome privilege.
But, for now, I'm glad to be back at this home.
Feb 23, 2009
Feb 4, 2009
Goodbye's
Maybe this will help to describe my goodbyes here.
I stopped in at my favorite Kimbap place tonight for dinner. I ordered dwenjan chegae to go, as usual. And, as I sat down to wait for it, I thought "I'm leaving Saturday. I need to tell them." So, in my broken Korean, I told them that I would be leaving on Saturday for America. They were excited and happy for me and then, they found out that I wouldn't be coming back. I tried to tell them that I loved their food. I tried to tell them that eating there was like going into Grandma's kitchen for dinner. I wanted to tell them that I would remember them and that, even though I didn't see them everyday and even though we didn't talk much, they were a big part of my life here in Korea. I tried, but couldn't.
But, I know they understood.
And, I know that she tried to tell me that she would miss me. That she was always happy to see me when I came in to eat. I know she wanted to tell me to be happy in America, and that she hoped I would have a good life. She tried, but, as she said, she has no English.
But, I still understood.
And, I think this is how most of my goodbye's are. I don't know quite what to say and neither do they... but we both know. I feel so loved here. My friends keep asking if this experience has been worth all the challenges I've faced and the hardships I've had...
Yes.
I stopped in at my favorite Kimbap place tonight for dinner. I ordered dwenjan chegae to go, as usual. And, as I sat down to wait for it, I thought "I'm leaving Saturday. I need to tell them." So, in my broken Korean, I told them that I would be leaving on Saturday for America. They were excited and happy for me and then, they found out that I wouldn't be coming back. I tried to tell them that I loved their food. I tried to tell them that eating there was like going into Grandma's kitchen for dinner. I wanted to tell them that I would remember them and that, even though I didn't see them everyday and even though we didn't talk much, they were a big part of my life here in Korea. I tried, but couldn't.
But, I know they understood.
And, I know that she tried to tell me that she would miss me. That she was always happy to see me when I came in to eat. I know she wanted to tell me to be happy in America, and that she hoped I would have a good life. She tried, but, as she said, she has no English.
But, I still understood.
And, I think this is how most of my goodbye's are. I don't know quite what to say and neither do they... but we both know. I feel so loved here. My friends keep asking if this experience has been worth all the challenges I've faced and the hardships I've had...
Yes.
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